Posted in Personal

Work in Progress.

Hi, it’s me again.

I didn’t want this weekend to go without publishing because it has been a minute. I miss being consistent here and if I’m being honest, it’s not entirely my fault. I’ve been trying to catch up with life outside this blog and I haven’t had time to make time. I don’t know if this makes sense but I know you understand.

You see this whole phase? This whole “I’ve graduated from the university” phase? It’s not so simple. As a matter of fact, I don’t think that I’ve been this confused in my entire life. I love being worried about what I’m going to wear and how to settle the never ending dramas in my life but making decisions? Don’t let anyone tell you that it’s not hard.

I’ve put off writing about my life after graduation for a while because if I’m being honest, it’s not exactly sunshine and roses over here. Before you begin to say that you don’t trust me, I’ll have you know that social media lies. These past few months have been mind blowing and eye opening. I don’t think I’ve ever been this confused or scared because I had my life planned out from the onset and I was so sure that I had everything figured out. I didn’t plan for unforeseen circumstances. It’s not that I lack foresight. It’s just life. Things happen, plans change, and so on but it was pretty hard for me to stop myself from drowning in self-doubt and pessimism. I have learned a lot and I’m still learning.

Weird selfie ‘cos why not?

At this age, I’m glad I know what I know now because my knowledge has made navigating through life easier for me. I’ve realized that this is the point in my life where as much as I have opportunities, there are also limitations, especially financial limitations and I know I’m not the only graduate experiencing this. I realized quite early that I’m not a business oriented person and this is because I have tried on more than one occasion to go into business but business hardly ever works out. I get jobs from time to time and honestly, I wish they were constant but you get the gist already.

Also, I’ve found that I’ve been stressing a lot this period. If you know me, you’ll know that it’s not physical stress. I just drain myself mentally because for some reason, I worry about a lot of things, mostly things that I can’t control. For example, NYSC. When do I start? Where will I be posted to? Will I like it there? Will they even have my size of uniform? The funny thing about all of this is that I know that I’ll go for service. Does this stop me from worrying? No. This is just one out of many.

Another thing is that I don’t like change. I usually find it hard to adjust so I get scared of alterations in my plans and when my plans change, especially when I don’t see it coming, it’s hard to keep my head in the game and I tend to lose focus and it doesn’t take long before I begin to wallow in self-pity and sadness until I’m able to drag myself out of that hole again.

This is a tip of the iceberg but this has been my life for the past few months. I said earlier that I’m glad that I know the things I know now because I’ve been able to identify those things that have been bothering me and instead of drowning in pessimism, I decided to do something about them.

So what are the things I’m doing to get through this annoying stage of my life?

  • I’ve decided to trust in God and in myself. I’m not going to lie and say that it’s easy because there are times when you just find it hard to believe and there are times when I even struggle to pray. There are also times when I forget to encourage myself and I’d wallow in doubt instead but I made a conscious decision not to leave God out of the equation because every single time I look back at where I’m coming from, I realize that there’s no way I would have made it this far without Him. I also decided to always keep saying words of affirmation to myself and reminding myself that I am exactly who I think I am. Anytime I begin to doubt myself, I take time out to list the things I’ve accomplished and that’s all I need to keep pushing.
  • I discovered and rediscovered my interests. Towards the end of 2020, I realized that I was beginning to lose interest in my interests and to an extent, my life was becoming monotonous because I was only doing one thing when I had the opportunity to do so much more. However, at the beginning of this year, I decided to start doing all the things I loved doing again and it has helped a lot. One of the things I love but stopped doing was reading so at the beginning of the year, I set a goal to read at least 50 books this year. I just finished my 22nd book and rediscovering this passion of mine has helped a lot because it’s easier to get lost in different worlds instead of worrying all the time. I also rediscovered my interest in food, music and my friends. It’s a beautiful ride, trust me.
  • I Changed my environment. This happened recently when I had to come back to school for clearance. I decided to stay back a bit and just enjoy this environment and honestly, it has helped a lot because I’ve gotten to see my friends, meet new people, brainstorm on different ideas and so on. It’s been refreshing. I know that I’ll soon start missing my family but the change has been worth it.

So basically, I’m chilling instead of worrying because I know that worrying won’t do me any good. I know that I’m a work in progress and while this stage of my life feels so slow, I know that I’m just starting and I’m going to do just fine. So here’s the update on my life so far in case you were wondering.

Love,

‘Ruona. ❤️

P.S:

I cannot believe that I didn’t publish in a whole month!! Did you miss me?

How have you been?

I’d like you to share one thing that was bothering you and a solution you found for the issue. Please don’t air me.

If you’re a graduate and you’re waiting for NYSC or you’re at a point in your life where things seem so slow, how are you holding up?

To the older ones in this life game, how was it for you when you graduated? What doubts did you face? Any advice?

Please make use of the comment box below. You know how much I love reading from you! 💜

Posted in motivation, Personal

Just Breathe.

Sometimes, all we need is a break. Sometimes, all we want to do is take some time away from the outside world, sit back, relax, and breathe. There are certain points in our lives where situations begin to take a toll on us and we begin to feel exhausted. In times like these, we find that some people won’t want to be around people, not necessarily because they have any beef with them and some other times, they might decide to take time off social media too because as we all know, it’s a whole world on its own. People do stuff like these from time to time because they’ve realized that for their sake and the sake of everyone, it’s proper to take a break and just breathe.

Last week, I temporarily disabled my Instagram account (if you know me well enough, you’ll know that I’m most active there) because I was beginning to feel pressured and overwhelmed. I guess exposing yourself to social media all the time does that to a person. I’m someone that thinks a lot so I know what filled my thoughts and honestly, what I needed was a break. I also realized that I needed to channel my energy to other things like my school work and my blog. I decided to take some time for myself, strategize and basically find clarity and so, I did. I went off for a few days and when I decided that I was ready to face the outside world again, I resumed my social media business lol.

Currently listening to this song on repeat.

The whole point of this gist is to let you know that your mental health is paramount. It is okay to take a break from stuff once in a while. It may be a few hours or even a few months but who cares? If you have the opportunity to take time out, do it because it would be impossible for you to give your best to the world if you’re not whole. Truth is that you may not even realize that you actually need a break until you take one.

I feel that we live better when we live without pressure and we tend to impact positively on others if we are happy. It is part of self-care; it is self-preservation. It is not selfish because this is your sanity we’re talking about. Honestly, you’d be happier. So whenever you can, please take some time out and just breathe.

Love,

‘Ruona ❤️

P.S:

Please tell me you understood the message I just passed across.

Have you been in situations where you felt overwhelmed and just needed time out?

What do you do when you feel the pressure is so much and you’re overwhelmed?

Do you have any self-care tips?

Are you following me on Instagram?

Please make use of the comment box below! You know how much I love hearing from you.